Ephesians 5:22-33 Click here for Bible Verses
Hi GAMErs!
Today’s passage is Ephesians 5:22-33.
Ephesians 5:22-33 (NIV)
22 Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.
23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.
24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her
26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word,
27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.
28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.
29 After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church–
30 for we are members of his body.
31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”
32 This is a profound mystery–but I am talking about Christ and the church.
33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
On verses 22-33: This passage is powerful as it gives us a greater appreciation for how Jesus loves us His bride, and a greater understanding of how a husband and wife should love one another.
Verses 25-27 tell us that Christ loved His church in two ways.
First, echoing language he uses elsewhere (e.g. Ephesians 5:1 and Galatians 2:20), Paul says that Jesus loved his bride in the most practical way when He “gave Himself up for her” (v25). Jesus’ love for us is a selfless, sacrificial, serving, “get your hands dirty” kind of love. But that’s not all.
Second, Jesus also loved His church with His words. Recalling Jesus’ own words in John 15:3 (“you are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you”), verse 26 says “to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word“. I love that. It’s talking about how Jesus cleansed us of our sins with the power of his word. Jesus could easily have used his words to point at everything his bride had done wrong and make her feel ashamed. But instead, with His words He protected her, defended her and cleansed her.
Husbands, never underestimate the impact your words have on your wife. With your words you can make your wife feel like a diamond or you can make her feel like dirt. Wives, same thing — watch how you speak to your husbands. The incredible thing about Jesus was: even though he knew his bride was full of stains, He used His words to cleanse her and defend her so that she would look to Him like “a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or other blemish, holy and blameless”. What an incredible Saviour who saved us!
In return, we His church are to lovingly submit to Christ’s leadership in everything (v23-24).
Christ’s perfect love for the church and the church’s total submission to Christ can be a daunting standard for a husband and wife to live up to. Sometimes I’ll hear husbands in one room complain, “My wife does not submit to me in everything!” and wives in the other room complain, “My husband is not worthy of my submission. He’s nowhere near like Christ!” If that’s your situation, can I make a suggestion?
For Husbands:
Husbands, instead of focusing on whether or not your wife is submitting to you, focus on loving your wife the way that Christ loved the church. God’s Word never said that your love for your wife should be conditional on your wife’s submission. How did Christ love the church?
– By putting her needs ahead of his own
– By overlooking her flaws and showing her grace
– By watching out for her the way he watches out for himself (v. 28-29, 33)
– By using his words to defend and protect her instead of accusing and condemning her
– By humbling himself and giving up his entire life for her even when she was the most stubborn, unsubmissive bride you could imagine.
We will never be completely like Jesus on this side of heaven, but if you focus on making Jesus your example in all that you do, your wife’s heart will begin to soften toward you. Over time she will willingly submit more and more to your leadership.
For Wives:
Similarly, wives, don’t focus on all the ways your husband is not like Christ. Instead (save for situations of abuse where your safety is in jeopardy) focus on being the best helpmate, supporter and fan of your husband. Your husband certainly has flaws (as do you), but you need to see your husband the way God sees him: as forgiven, cleansed, blameless, holy, worthy of respect and honour, all because of Jesus’ blood. If you humbly submit to your imperfect husband as if submitting to Christ, if you will work hard at being the best helpmate, teammate and playmate your husband can ask for, you will free up your husband to become the man and leader God made him to be. With your prayers, encouragement and belief in God and in him, your husband can become that man.
A Final Word
Don’t you see? The way to a great marriage is not by trying to control and condemn the other person, but by showing grace to the other person even when that other person is not serving you. When you trust God and love your spouse that way, never giving up, you allow God to make you more like Jesus and fill your marriage with His presence, His love and His power.
Heavenly Father, thank You that though marriage is not easy, marriage is Your idea and it is good. Thank You that we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us. Thank You for the example of Your Son Jesus who showed us the greatest love we will ever know. Please change me and fill me, that I would love the people in my home like Christ loves me. Through my actions and words, may Jesus be glorified in my home. In Jesus’ name, AMEN!
