Song of Songs 4:1-16 (CLICK HERE FOR BIBLE VERSES)
Hi GAMErs,
A NOTE FOR PARENTS AND KIDS ABOUT TODAY’S GAME SHARING: In today’s Bible passage we are talking about the gift of sex. Given the nature of today’s topic, we would advise parents to review this GAME sharing first before your kids do and then decide whether your kids should see it. Kids, if you are reading this, please ask your parent or guardian to review this GAME sharing first before you read it and ask your parent or guardian if they think you should read it now or wait until you’re older.
Today’s passage is Song of Songs 4:1-16. I encourage you to read the passage yourself first and see what you can glean with the Holy Spirit’s help, then read the GAME sharing below. Let’s go!
Song of Songs 4:1-7 (NIV)
1 How beautiful you are, my darling! Oh, how beautiful! Your eyes behind your veil are doves. Your hair is like a flock of goats descending from Mount Gilead.
2 Your teeth are like a flock of sheep just shorn, coming up from the washing. Each has its twin; not one of them is alone.
3 Your lips are like a scarlet ribbon; your mouth is lovely. Your temples behind your veil are like the halves of a pomegranate.
4 Your neck is like the tower of David, built with elegance; on it hang a thousand shields, all of them shields of warriors.
5 Your two breasts are like two fawns, like twin fawns of a gazelle that browse among the lilies.
6 Until the day breaks and the shadows flee, I will go to the mountain of myrrh and to the hill of incense.
7 All beautiful you are, my darling; there is no flaw in you.
On verses 1-7: The end of chapter 3 and all of Song of Songs 4 are a huge turning point in the love story between the guy and the girl. The end of chapter 3 depicts their wedding. Chapter 4 depicts their wedding night. (Notice that 5 times in chapter 4 the guy refers to the girl as “my bride”.) While in their honeymoon suite, the guy praises the girl’s beauty, using images and comparisons that would have meant something to the girl in her culture. The guy gets specific when expressing how much he loves and enjoys the different parts of his bride’s body.
What can we learn from this? Be vocal about your spouse’s beauty. Take the time to admire and appreciate the different aspects of how beautiful your spouse is. Even if there are things about your spouse that you do not like, the fact is that as your spouse they are worth your admiration. Husbands, just as Christ looks at us His church as His blameless, flawless bride (Ephesians 5:25-27), if there is anyone in the world who needs to tell your wife, “All beautiful you are, my darling; there is no flaw in you” (v7), it is you her husband. Like the guy in this chapter, find ways to tell your spouse how beautiful they are in ways that are meaningful to them. You don’t need to be corny, but you need to be sincere, and you need to try.
The more you take the time to admire and appreciate your spouse, chances are the sweeter your relationship and sex life will be.
Song of Songs 4:8-9 (NIV)
8 Come with me from Lebanon, my bride, come with me from Lebanon. Descend from the crest of Amana, from the top of Senir, the summit of Hermon, from the lions’ dens and the mountain haunts of the leopards.
9 You have stolen my heart, my sister, my bride; you have stolen my heart with one glance of your eyes, with one jewel of your necklace.
On verses 8-9: On the wedding night when this bride is about to lose her virginity, there is understandable anxiety and fear that the bride is going through, as well as possibly thoughts of missing home. The “lions’ dens and mountain haunts of the leopards” (v8) may refer to the quiet fears and anxieties the bride was experiencing. This was the guy’s way of reassuring the girl not to be afraid or anxious on their wedding night.
What can we learn from this? The joy of sex between a husband and wife is not simply physical, but it’s emotional and psychological as well. Some try to reduce sex to nothing more than a physical transaction, but there is so much more to good sex than that. In order for a married couple to enjoy sex together, the husband and wife need to serve each other’s psychological and emotional needs.
In verse 9 when the guy says, “you have stolen my heart, my sister, my bride; you have stolen my heart”, it reminds me of Proverbs 5 where it says “May you rejoice in the wife of your youth…may you ever be captivated by her love”. If you are married, I pray the same for you: may you ever be captivated by the person you said yes to.
Song of Songs 4:10-16 (NIV)
10 How delightful is your love, my sister, my bride! How much more pleasing is your love than wine, and the fragrance of your perfume than any spice!
11 Your lips drop sweetness as the honeycomb, my bride; milk and honey are under your tongue. The fragrance of your garments is like that of Lebanon.
12 You are a garden locked up, my sister, my bride; you are a spring enclosed, a sealed fountain.
13 Your plants are an orchard of pomegranates with choice fruits, with henna and nard,
14 nard and saffron, calamus and cinnamon, with every kind of incense tree, with myrrh and aloes and all the finest spices.
15 You are a garden fountain, a well of flowing water streaming down from Lebanon.
16 Awake, north wind, and come, south wind! Blow on my garden, that its fragrance may spread abroad. Let my lover come into his garden and taste its choice fruits.
On verses 10-16: The newlyweds progress from the guy praising the girl’s beauty (v1-7) to the guy calming her fears and inviting her to respond physically (v8-9) to them kissing (v10-11) to them engaging in foreplay (v12-15) until the girl is ready for intercourse (v16).
What can we learn from this? Notice that the newlyweds take their time to try to enjoy every part of the process leading to sex. All five of their senses (taste, sight, touch, smell and sound) are engaged. Both are active in loving one another. Those who fully enjoy sex take their time to appreciate the little things that lead up to it.
Father, thank You for the gift of sex between a husband and a wife. For every married couple reading this sharing, I pray that You would bless their sex life and that You would teach them how to enjoy sex to the fullest. Give them wisdom to serve each other’s physical, emotional and psychological needs. For those who desire to get married, thank You that You know the plans You have for them, plans to prosper them and not to harm them. Help them to trust You to work all things out in Your perfect time and way. In Jesus’ name, AMEN!
Copyright © 2022 Justin Lim. All rights reserved.
