Song of Songs 7:1-13 (CLICK HERE FOR BIBLE VERSES)
Hi GAMErs,
A NOTE FOR PARENTS AND KIDS: Given the nature of today’s topic, we would advise parents to review this GAME sharing first before your kids do and then decide whether your kids should see it. Kids, if you are reading this, please ask your parent or guardian to review this GAME sharing first before you read it and ask your parent or guardian if they think you should read it now or wait until you’re older.
Today’s passage is Song of Songs 7:1-13. I encourage you to read the passage yourself first and see what you can glean with the Holy Spirit’s help, then read the GAME sharing below. Let’s go!
Song of Songs 7:1-8 (NIV)
1 How beautiful your sandaled feet, O prince’s daughter! Your graceful legs are like jewels, the work of a craftsman’s hands.
2 Your navel is a rounded goblet that never lacks blended wine. Your waist is a mound of wheat encircled by lilies.
3 Your breasts are like two fawns, twins of a gazelle.
4 Your neck is like an ivory tower. Your eyes are the pools of Heshbon by the gate of Bath Rabbim. Your nose is like the tower of Lebanon looking toward Damascus.
5 Your head crowns you like Mount Carmel. Your hair is like royal tapestry; the king is held captive by its tresses.
6 How beautiful you are and how pleasing, O love, with your delights!
7 Your stature is like that of the palm, and your breasts like clusters of fruit.
8 I said, “I will climb the palm tree; I will take hold of its fruit.” May your breasts be like the clusters of the vine, the fragrance of your breath like apples,
9 and your mouth like the best wine. May the wine go straight to my lover, flowing gently over lips and teeth.
On verses 1-9: As you read verses 1-8 you may think that they sound just like the guy’s praise of his wife’s beauty in previous chapters. However, the difference here is that the guy’s words in verses 1-8 are now even more intimate and direct than his previous praises of his wife. When the guy says to his wife in verse 2 “your navel is a rounded goblet that never lacks blended wine” and calls her waist “a mount of wheat”, he is basically telling his wife that she is like the most delicious food to him.
Interestingly, many scholars believe that in verse 9 the wife interrupts the husband’s praises of her. In particular, to me it makes sense to see the wife beginning to talk in the middle of verse 9 when she says, “May the wine go straight to my lover”. If indeed this is the wife interrupting the husband, then the overall picture is that this couple is now more comfortable with one another than they were on their wedding night. While there is still great respect for one another and while they still speak in honouring ways to each other, their communication is more intimate and playful than before. It’s because they are growing in intimacy and freedom, both in their relationship as a whole as well as in their sex life in particular.
What can we learn from this? In a healthy marriage, there is growing intimacy and freedom between the husband and the wife, both in terms of their friendship as a whole as well as specifically in regards to sex. The shyness and awkwardness of the wedding night gives way to being more carefree, more direct, more playful, and more intimate.
Also, notice how the wife responds to the husband’s wooing her. Rather than pushing him away, she welcomes him to come closer. The result is deeper intimacy between the two. Husbands, give your wife something sweet to respond to. Wives, take note of when your husband is trying to be sweet to you and respond in kind.
So there are potentially two dynamics happening in the relationship between this husband and wife. First, there’s a growing sense of freedom and playfulness with one another. Second, the wife responds welcomingly to the husband’s wooing her.
I find that these two dynamics happen in our relationship with the Holy Spirit as well. In a healthy relationship with God, there is a growing sense of intimacy, freedom, security and even playfulness, even as there remains a great deal of honour and respect. Also, intimacy with God happens when we take note of the Holy Spirit drawing us close and respond by welcoming Him. When that happens, the result is greater intimacy with God. I pray this for you too: first, that you would enjoy a freedom and playfulness in how you relate to the Holy Spirit (all the while maintaining a sense of honour and respect) and, second, that you respond welcomingly to the Holy Spirit’s advances.
Song of Songs 7:10 (NIV)
10 I belong to my lover, and his desire is for me.
On verse 10: Before the wife would say, “my lover is mine and I am his” (2:16) or “I am my lover’s and my lover’s is mine” (6:3). Now the wife is saying “I belong to my lover, and his desire is for me” (7:10). While it is a similar idea to what the wife would say before, it takes a deeper level of security in the wife and in the relationship for her to say, “I belong to him and he wants me.”
What can we learn from this? In a healthy marriage, in addition to a growing sense of intimacy and freedom, there is a growing sense of security about where each stands with the other. Whereas earlier in the relationship one or both of them might get jealous quickly or feel insecure easily, as they invest in their marriage and grow closer together, jealousy gives way to security.
In your relationship with Jesus, may there also be a growing sense of security, where you know without a shadow of a doubt that He loves you and that His desire is for you. It’s not just about you loving God. It’s about knowing deep down that God loves you and desires you.
Song of Songs 7:11-13 (NIV)
11 Come, my lover, let us go to the countryside, let us spend the night in the villages.
12 Let us go early to the vineyards to see if the vines have budded, if their blossoms have opened, and if the pomegranates are in bloom– there I will give you my love.
13 The mandrakes send out their fragrance, and at our door is every delicacy, both new and old, that I have stored up for you, my lover.
On verses 11-13: Notice here that, after all this sweet talk between the husband and the wife, it is the wife who actually takes action and initiates spending the night together in the countryside. What can we learn from this? While from a Biblical perspective it is true that the husband is and should be seen as the leader in the relationship (see Ephesians 5:22-24), and while often it is and should be the husband initiating romance with the wife, the fact is that it is exciting, fun and empowering for most husbands when the wife from time to time initiates sex too. A husband may settle for being the initiator of sex with his wife each and every time. He may settle for a wife who agrees to have sex but is not actively engaged in it and is simply and passively acquiescing to his request. But what the husband really wants is a wife who enjoys having sex with him and who also initiates sex with him from time to time.
It takes courage to be an initiator and to take a risk, especially in marriage. No relationship can grow without both parties taking initiative and taking risks with one another. So when God or your spouse takes initiative and risks themselves to reach out to you, don’t take it for granted but appreciate them and encourage them. And may you also not be afraid to initiate and take risks that can lead to deeper intimacy, be it with God or with your spouse.
Jesus, thank You that I belong to You and Your desire is for me. I pray for every married couple and for every person who wants to get married one day. May their marriage to their spouse as well as their relationship with You grow more and more in intimacy, freedom and security. In Jesus’ name, AMEN!
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